U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Also, beer. Big fan.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
