I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Randomize