sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize
