Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
