...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
