my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Just high enough for therapy.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
