Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
