so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
