I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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