I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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