They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
