Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I am one with the molecules
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
