Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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