u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
