Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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