Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Randomize
