their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
