How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
ok first of all what the fuck
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
