I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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