I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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