You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
