addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I am mentally ready for anal.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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