wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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