You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Randomize
