We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
