I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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