I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
