Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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