Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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