Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
