Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
