i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Oh god it's open bar.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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