Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
