i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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