Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize