I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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