VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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