she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize
