There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Randomize
