I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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