I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
