Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
