I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
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