i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize
