do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
