brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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