Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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