Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Randomize
