Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
