VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
